Monday, December 19, 2011
Pie Baking!
Monday, December 12, 2011
Cancer Etiquette for Dummies
Over the last 9 months, it has been both my good luck and pleasure to have wonderful friends and family help me. However, occasionally on this up-hill road, I have met or been re-introduced to friends and family that just don't know how to talk to a cancer patient.
Cancer patients aren't really any different than normal people, we just have a heightened sense and appreciation for our health and lives. In casual conversations with us, do not immediately say, "oh yeah, my mother/aunt/sister died from breast cancer." Come on, even a five year old would be a little smarter! Do not treat us as if we are made of glass, do not ignore us by withholding invitations (if we feel like going/doing it we will, we're not stupid-just sick) and hug us as often as you can. Don't assume that we don't want to do something, ask us.
If you are not comfortable being around us, the feeling will probably be mutual so just stay away. If you want to share a few moments with us out of your busy day, don't ask us to call you when it is convenient, just call and say "hey, I have some time to spare this afternoon, are you free to go get ice cream!" Cancer patients and me especially love ice cream. (or Pie, I would go for coffee and pie just about any time.) Just call us, we need the input of human kindness most of all.
You need to know the following: During Chemo, eating is touch and go. Soups, malt-0-meal, ice cream and smoothies are what a patient survives on, when the mouth ulcers will let them. During Surgery we eat anything we can get our hands on - but we can't drive anywhere or lift even 10 pounds. Offer to just drive us around and get us out of the house! During Radiation we will still eat just about anything. We can do more for ourselves but we are scared that the treatment may not have gotten everything and we need to keep our minds completely occupied. The twice a day radiation that IBC patients have to go thru is just crummy. The positions that they put you in can cause a lot of cramping, backache and some short term numbness. But other than that, the radiation itself doesn't hurt during the first couple of weeks. I'll let you know if it gets worse/better as I go through my schedule.
You learn who your REAL friends are during cancer treatments. They are the ones that don't treat you like you have leprosy and will go out of their comfort zone to make you feel loved. We are humans that are in a battle for our lives, but we need to live today as much as we can. We eat out, go to movies and sleep a lot. Sometimes we want company and sometimes we just want to be still and enjoy the quite.
Go out there and smile at people, hug them when you can, shake a hand and express your gratitude for your friendships. Treat Cancer patients like anyone else, except maybe love on us just a little bit more than normal, we appreciate it.
Cancer patients aren't really any different than normal people, we just have a heightened sense and appreciation for our health and lives. In casual conversations with us, do not immediately say, "oh yeah, my mother/aunt/sister died from breast cancer." Come on, even a five year old would be a little smarter! Do not treat us as if we are made of glass, do not ignore us by withholding invitations (if we feel like going/doing it we will, we're not stupid-just sick) and hug us as often as you can. Don't assume that we don't want to do something, ask us.
If you are not comfortable being around us, the feeling will probably be mutual so just stay away. If you want to share a few moments with us out of your busy day, don't ask us to call you when it is convenient, just call and say "hey, I have some time to spare this afternoon, are you free to go get ice cream!" Cancer patients and me especially love ice cream. (or Pie, I would go for coffee and pie just about any time.) Just call us, we need the input of human kindness most of all.
You need to know the following: During Chemo, eating is touch and go. Soups, malt-0-meal, ice cream and smoothies are what a patient survives on, when the mouth ulcers will let them. During Surgery we eat anything we can get our hands on - but we can't drive anywhere or lift even 10 pounds. Offer to just drive us around and get us out of the house! During Radiation we will still eat just about anything. We can do more for ourselves but we are scared that the treatment may not have gotten everything and we need to keep our minds completely occupied. The twice a day radiation that IBC patients have to go thru is just crummy. The positions that they put you in can cause a lot of cramping, backache and some short term numbness. But other than that, the radiation itself doesn't hurt during the first couple of weeks. I'll let you know if it gets worse/better as I go through my schedule.
You learn who your REAL friends are during cancer treatments. They are the ones that don't treat you like you have leprosy and will go out of their comfort zone to make you feel loved. We are humans that are in a battle for our lives, but we need to live today as much as we can. We eat out, go to movies and sleep a lot. Sometimes we want company and sometimes we just want to be still and enjoy the quite.
Go out there and smile at people, hug them when you can, shake a hand and express your gratitude for your friendships. Treat Cancer patients like anyone else, except maybe love on us just a little bit more than normal, we appreciate it.
Thursday, December 1, 2011
Surgery and Recovery
Sorry it has taken me so long to write. The week of my surgery was also my birthday and we celebrated by having a home cooked dinner with Nita, Mother, Kelsey and Evie in Midland. Then when we shipped out (Libby and I) we had a wonderful dinner with her nephew Sam (we will be talking about this meal for a long time - can you say white chocolate bread pudding - yummy) on Sunday and a great Italian dinner with Sherry and Barry on Monday night. It was great to have Sherry and Barry come down to root me on thru surgery. On Tuesday, my breast removal went well. The staff at MDAnderson is the best! Where else in the world can you go in for surgery and have peace and quite to sleep..
The drainage tubes were a bitch to deal will. Was able to have one removed after 3 weeks but the last tube stayed in until just a few days before thanksgiving. Working on getting my range of motion back. Kelsey and Evie were waiting for me when I arrived home from Surgery (once again, Libby traveled with me for the ordeal and stayed with me in Houston for 4-5 days). It was amazing how good I felt after surgery. Oh, maybe that was the pain meds ;-). But I do believe that the block that they used in surgery had a good 10 day effect to minimize the pain. It was so funny, one minute I am sitting on the side of the bed talking to the anesthesiologist while she marks my neck, a nurse walks around in front of me-smiles and says "I'm just going to place my hands on your shoulders to balance you." the next thing I know I am waking up from surgery. Now that's the way to do it! Good meds thereafter made the first week bearable. Not too many could or would stand around to help with the daily work on the tubes but I managed just fine. Thank God I do not have a queasy stomach. ;-) Nita had made me a whole batch of different sized pillows for my birthday and they really helped me and gave Evie something to play with. (See the photo below for one of the pillows Nita made for me.) Evie and Kelsey are my best Medicine any time of day or night. I sat in he floor with Evie my first week of recovery and played and played until we both took naps. Kelsey continues to text me and send pictures of Evie and the effect of viewing those photos is marvelous.
About 10 days after surgery, I was called with the results of the pathology report. Although I had great margins at the time of surgery, the pathology report came back bad. Now the radiation therapy is more important than ever and will begin shortly. Gotta heal up first. Radiation will be twice a day, Monday thru Friday, for about 5 weeks. Can you say happy holidays... ;-( Oh well, we will "make it work!"
Keep praying for me! I will have to go thru more chemo after radiation and some of it will include some experimental treatment. Dang old IBC is a tough nut to crack and to stop. My ornery side is wearing thin, but the battle continues. With your help, prayers and support I will fight and claw my way back!
Day after Surgery!
The drainage tubes were a bitch to deal will. Was able to have one removed after 3 weeks but the last tube stayed in until just a few days before thanksgiving. Working on getting my range of motion back. Kelsey and Evie were waiting for me when I arrived home from Surgery (once again, Libby traveled with me for the ordeal and stayed with me in Houston for 4-5 days). It was amazing how good I felt after surgery. Oh, maybe that was the pain meds ;-). But I do believe that the block that they used in surgery had a good 10 day effect to minimize the pain. It was so funny, one minute I am sitting on the side of the bed talking to the anesthesiologist while she marks my neck, a nurse walks around in front of me-smiles and says "I'm just going to place my hands on your shoulders to balance you." the next thing I know I am waking up from surgery. Now that's the way to do it! Good meds thereafter made the first week bearable. Not too many could or would stand around to help with the daily work on the tubes but I managed just fine. Thank God I do not have a queasy stomach. ;-) Nita had made me a whole batch of different sized pillows for my birthday and they really helped me and gave Evie something to play with. (See the photo below for one of the pillows Nita made for me.) Evie and Kelsey are my best Medicine any time of day or night. I sat in he floor with Evie my first week of recovery and played and played until we both took naps. Kelsey continues to text me and send pictures of Evie and the effect of viewing those photos is marvelous.
About 10 days after surgery, I was called with the results of the pathology report. Although I had great margins at the time of surgery, the pathology report came back bad. Now the radiation therapy is more important than ever and will begin shortly. Gotta heal up first. Radiation will be twice a day, Monday thru Friday, for about 5 weeks. Can you say happy holidays... ;-( Oh well, we will "make it work!"
Keep praying for me! I will have to go thru more chemo after radiation and some of it will include some experimental treatment. Dang old IBC is a tough nut to crack and to stop. My ornery side is wearing thin, but the battle continues. With your help, prayers and support I will fight and claw my way back!
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